Commentary: More than one road to enlightenment

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So, I had to go to church last week for a niece's first Communion. Readers who are also parishioners at Lumen Christi Catholic Church in Mequon will be happy to know the place wasn't struck by lightning during my visit.

Fortunately, it was a Catholic church, so the mass is comparatively short and all goes according to rigid procedural rules. Thus, it's kind of like being in an efficient, well-run courtroom, something I find very comforting.

I'd much rather be in court, though. Whenever I'm in a church, I feel kind of like the folks who sit in the back of the courtroom, the ones who make too much money to be eligible for a court-appointed lawyer but not enough to actually hire one.

Still, the only really awkward part was when the priest said we should all pray "for world leaders." My brother and I looked at each other in horror and, needless to say, we did nothing of the sort. It was as bad as the last time I was in church, and the priest said we should pray "for union leaders."

But, all in all, it was a relatively painless experience.

The next day was much more to my taste, though.

I went down to that big, bad fleshpot they call Chicago for the Seventh Circuit Bar Association's annual conference. In particular, I went to: (1) hear Professor Richard Epstein defend the U.S. Supreme Court's opinions in Twombly and Iqbal; and (2) get back to associating with my own kind.

Epstein, you may recall, is the author of the book "Takings," which then-senator Joe Biden waved around at the Clarence Thomas hearings back in 1991, demanding to know how anyone who had read such a book should be considered for the Supreme Court.

I had a grand time at the conference and found myself wishing it was a weekly thing, rather than just once a year.

And in the contemplation of that, I had what you could call an epiphany. It occurred to me that the people at the church the day before must derive something akin to what I feel when lawyers and judges sit around debating the rules of civil procedure — enlightenment and community.

Rather appropriately, "Lumen Christi" is Latin for "Light of Christ."

Unlike me, though, they get to do it every Sunday.

My loss, I guess.