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What your body says can be as important as the words you speak, especially when it comes to putting clients at ease.

It’s the reason more and more law schools are adding so-called “soft skills” courses, such as client interviewing and counseling. And it’s the reason attorney and adjunct professor Michelle Fitzgerald runs simulations with her students at Marquette University Law School.

“Mannerisms might betray you,” said Fitzgerald, a family law attorney and founder of Horizons Law Group, which has offices in Brookfield, Hartford and Kenosha.

It’s a lesson Gretchen Viney, a clinical professor and director of the Lawyering Skills program at the University of Wisconsin Law School, shares with her students, as well.

“Personal interaction skills are as important for interviewing and counseling as a knowledge of the law, well almost as important,” she said. “It doesn’t do any good to have the information, if we can’t convey it to our clients.”

Teaching interview techniques, including body language, often comes down to common sense. And, in many cases, developing the knack comes down to learning from what not to do, something Fitzgerald’s students learn not only through simulations, but also by observing several mediators, including at least one whom, they deduced, used exaggerated body language to try to mask a lack of preparation.

So, what can you do to put clients at ease and keep your body from undermining your message?

“We tend to overanalyze all the things were supposed to be doing,” Viney said. “The idea is that you’re going to be with a client, so be with that client.”

Fitzgerald added, “Be true to yourself and, of course, your good lawyering skills, and the rest will follow.”

Here are a few more of their suggestions:

Relax

“I’m not talking about slouching or putting my feet up on the desk,” said Fitzgerald, who teaches mediation advocacy. “It might be a simple act of leaning back in my chair or putting my hands down. That body language says to them, ‘I’m giving you time. I’m not looking to get a quick story and rush out the door.’”

It’s also important to show clients you’re accessible. Hiding behind your computer screen or taking notes constantly can convey a feeling of being closed off. Fidgeting is another no-no.

“Lawyers have to learn what their idiosyncrasies are,” Viney said. “I tend to be fidgety. So, it’s important that I always have something in my hand, a pen or a coffee cup, to keep me from fidgeting.”

Break the ice … carefully

If you’re tempted to open with a joke, don’t.

“Humor is sometimes not the best way to go,” Viney said. “When people are in legal trouble, even if some aspect of it seems kind of humorous to the lawyer, it may or may not seem humorous to the client.”

Instead, talk about the big game, ask if they had trouble parking or ask about the weather.

“Clients can be nervous meeting with an attorney,” Fitzgerald said. “Trying to connect on a human level of, ‘Oh, it’s raining outside. Are you OK?’ or making a little small talk helps. It’s just the relatability, any little thing that shows you’re interested in them.”

Listen

Listening involves more than your ears. It starts with facing your client.

Then, Fitzgerald said, “Smile. Look concerned. Nod. Those small things help clients know that you’re listening.”

Long meetings require further attention and cues, Viney said.

“If you are losing focus or you feel like the client is starting to not pay attention, you might lean slightly toward the client and maintain eye contact,” she said. “It’s how can we demonstrate to the client that we are attentive and trustworthy.”

Viney said she tends to let clients take the lead, especially during an initial interview. But, she said, attorneys shouldn’t feel bound by the old idea of never interrupting a client.

“There are times to interrupt,” she said. “But, when you’re first meeting a client, it’s probably best to let the client take the lead and do the talking, if they’re able to do so. A lot of times they aren’t, and they need questions to get going. [Then] you have to rely on continuers, like smiles or nods — we call them ‘nonjudgmental continuers,’ like ‘mmm hmm, I see.’ Anything to keep them talking.”

Don’t judge

“In client interviewing and counseling, we usually talk about trying to act open and, if not exactly friendly, at least accepting,” Viney said. “It’s important generally to not be judgmental, even if the situation seems to be begging for a judgmental comment.”

Fitzgerald agreed.

“You have to check your own personal viewpoint at the door and try to be the neutral person,” she said. “Body language plays a role, because you could react with your body by bristling or looking as if you’re going to react in a certain way.”

Controlling those sometimes involuntary responses is important.

Nodding can help counteract those, Fitzgerald advised. It not only shows you’re listening, but also conveys a sense of neutrality and can diffuse a grimace or shrug. She also makes sure to have a pad and paper ready so she can take a note if she feels like she might react strongly to something a client says.

And to make sure she doesn’t sound dismissive, Fitzgerald said she relies on comments such as, “It sounds like that’s very important to you. Let’s make sure we note that.”